How much progress can you make during a big move?

But honestly, I don't really care anymore lol. Yes I will still work on the comic, no I will not give up, but there is just so much external shit going on that I have lost the sense of urgency I used to associate with accomplishing something towards the comic. And you know what? That actually feels kind of freeing.

So despite those rather crass and discouraging first few lines, this post is going to go over the table of contents topics with a pretty positive mindset. All based off of logic!

What to expect when you have to move

This move in particular was cross-province, so my furniture wouldn't be arriving for a while until after my person does. Knowing this, and thinking that I'd have a good period of time where I would have absolutely nothing to do (finished packing, took time off work, etc.), I brought along an old small tablet.

Now I knew I was going to be busy with packing and unpacking, but it turns out that every part of it in between and after was wild. Here's the schedule of events that then occured:

• Day 1 - Just finished packing through the night, hands hurt, feet hurt
• Day 2 - Still exhausted as hell from yesterday, and since I've been working non-stop for months (whether it be actual work, dealing with the move, or working on the comic/blog), I felt it well-deserved to take a break for the day. ...But dear lord I can't sleep with this snoring beside me. Exhaustion not cured
• Day 3 - I broke out some earplugs but the sound is still raw. Exhaustion not cured!!
• Day 4 - Plane rides are exhausting
• Day 5-8 - Landed in new province, lots of stuff to prepare and buy, sleep issue not resolved for the next three nights. Did start coding some new blog features with the little time I have before (attempted) sleep, but definitely did not have energy or desire to draw
• Day 9-? - A shitload of contracting services, purchasing, cleaning, etc. Most importantly I can finally sleep in a different room and therefore finally actually sleep
• Recently - Belongings arrived, lots of stuff damaged (including my PC wtf movers), unpacking hell, work started again

So when did I use the backup tablet? That's right, never! "Absolutely nothing to do" is a grand lie when you're half dead. The one thing you should do is rest, but rest was so ridiculously hard to come by.

Why I don't feel like a failure, and why you shouldn't too

I think the above made it pretty clear why, but in case of tl;dr; holy fuck this was so exhausting. I've actually moved tons of times before but this was by far the most painful one. So for anyone in the same shoes, or anyone who is going to be partaking in some sort of big event in the near future:

There are probably more loose ends to tie up than you can plan for. So be prepared that no progress may be made, but don't be worried or disappointed. There's nothing wrong with getting your life back on track first.

If you don't take care of more pressing priorities, you won't be in the right mindset to work on the things you're actually excited to make. This is a passion project, not something I want to hate doing--I know it's going to take time and effort, so I'll tackle it when I have the time and effort to expend on it.

That post description of "Will I succeed in accomplishing something, or disappoint everyone and myself"? The answer is neither--success isn't binary. I didn't manage to work on the comic because I was busy accomplishing other parts of my life. And with the huge amount and calibre of changes that have occured on that end, not only am I not at all disappointed--but I now have tons of upgrades that will facilitate me on this project too.

Why it's okay to lose motivation and how to get it back

I haven't had any motivation to work on both the comic and this site for a while. But to be fair, it's more like I've been too exhausted to do any sort of work. Today is honestly the first day in half a month that I've felt any motivation and energy to draw--with the energy part most likely being the deciding factor.

Losing motivation in these kind of situations is natural. The more immediate priorities I gain, the less time I have to even think about personal projects--and the less I think about it, the less important it inevitably becomes to the current me. So now that I'm finally almost settled in, some leeway for creative thought has returned, and I can start living instead of trying to live. But it's 2:55am on a work day so I'm writing this blog post instead lol

It's been a good while since I've felt any sort of excitement thinking about my story and characters. Feels good to have the mental and physical capacity to care again. So if you've really wanted a personal project to happen, but it's currently stalled for whatever reason, don't rush it and don't give up on it; take care of yourself first, and the motivation will come back to you.

In other news

Site update! Here's what I did manage to do on the plane and on those nights of no sleep:

• Implemented a table of contents
• Added the ability to skip the homepage animation:
  • So that it no longer runs twice in the same session (wanted to do this before the move but had no time)
  • When you revisit this site the second time onwards, you can turn off the animation permanently, and restore it again whenever with a cheese icon in the header
  • I actually coded this part on the plane so it's a bit buggy, but I'll deal with it again when more people read this blog lol
• Changed the mailing list sign up message in the footer, since it was probably too out there for people to realize that it was a mailing list
• Gave the homepage header character a tablet pen so that the image makes more sense with regards to the site's title (they will both make even more sense when the comic comes out)

Also thought up a new post topic, "How to write down the ideas you get at the most inopportune moments", which is something that plagues me a lot (the entire premise of the comic came while I was in the shower), but will hopefully be starting on the actual drawing again soon for a proper first progress post.

Even if I don't meet the October deadline goal, the world will keep spinning, and so will my brain and pen!